Eighteen

*Bella*

My eyes fluttered open the next morning and landed on the skin of Edward's neck, his even breaths hot against the top of my head.  His arms were still wrapped around me, our legs were still tangled together and I was completely content.  I smiled softly, leaning back a little and watching as he continued to sleep.

He looked completely relaxed, the lines on his forehead gone from the day before and his lips slightly pursed.  I slowly slid my arm from around his waist, placing my hand over his heart and closing my eyes as I concentrated on his heartbeat, steady and strong underneath my palm.

He was real.  He was the one that I was with and he was the one that I should've been thinking about all day yesterday; not Mike.  I loved Mike, I always would and there was a very big part of me that had never wanted to wake up from that dream, but he wasn't here anymore.  He wasn't around and I couldn't do anything to change that.  But Edward was.  Edward was here, he was real and he, for some unfathomable reason, wanted me.

It was hard as fuck to think about letting go of Mike.  I'd held on to him for so long, he'd been the one person I could always talk to – even after his death, through the journal I used to write to him in – when I needed it and he'd been the one constant thing in my life.  But he wasn't there and it was exhausting holding on to a ghost.

I knew that there was a part of me that would never be able to give him up, much in the same fashion that I'd never been able to give Josh up no matter what Tanya thought.  Mike had helped me with that and now, maybe Edward could help me with this.  Maybe he could be the one to save me.

I swallowed hard and blew out a slow breath, shaking my head.

It was hard thinking about things that way.  My heart was breaking and mending all at the same time and the rest of me was having issues coping with everything that was going on.  I never thought that there'd be anyone else; I thought that Mike was it.  And Edward… Edward had the ability to be everything I'd never been looking for and that was terrifying.

I didn't want to think about all that had happened yesterday with Rosalie.  It was too much to deal with and think about when I felt like I was on the edge of breaking down.  I was going to make it right and I was going to fix myself as much as possible – no matter how scared I was.  Everyone in my life deserved it and damn it, I did, too.  I deserved happiness at some point and if I could find that with Edward, then I would do everything I could to protect it.

I hated being the way that I was.  I hated being scared of everything that may or may not have been around every corner.  I hated that there was still a part of me that was scared of Edward and all the things that he was making me feel.  I hated that I still wanted to hide in a corner and rebuild the wall that he'd just started to take down because he didn't deserve it.  He deserved someone who was ready and willing to give herself to him completely and I wanted to be that person.  I wanted that more than anything in the world.

I splayed my fingers out on his chest, creating bumps in his shirt as I ran my hand over and up to his opposite shoulder.  I cupped my hand around his neck briefly before I reached up and carefully threaded my fingers through his hair.  I slid my thumb across his forehead a few times, smirking when his eyebrows twitched and he snorted a little.  I untangled my hand from his hair, placed it on his cheek, leaned in and gently touched my lips to his.

If I was going to give my heart away to someone else, I'd want it to be him.  That, all on its own, was mind-numbingly terrifying.  No matter the truth that went with it, it still scared the shit out of me.

I dropped my hand, slowly turning my back to him and gently prying his arms from around my waist.  I slid to the edge of the mattress and turned around to drape the blanket over him, standing up, leaning over and softly kissing his forehead.

"Don't leave me, Bella," he whispered.

I pulled back a little, watching as his eyes fluttered open and he looked up at me.

"What?"

"Don't go."

"I was just going to make us some coffee…"

"I need you more than I need coffee."

"Are you okay?" I asked as I slid one of my knees onto the mattress and placed my palms down in front of him.

He nodded and his hand slid out from underneath the blanket, slowly searching for mine.  I grabbed it, linked our fingers and let him weakly pull me back to his side.

"I just… yesterday morning, we didn't get…"  He huffed and closed his eyes, shaking his head as he squeezed my hand.  "I wanna wake up with you.  That's all."

I nodded and lay back down, getting close to him once more and curling up against him as he draped the blanket back over me.  He kept my hand in his, his other arm curling underneath me and wrapping around my waist.  He trailed his hand up and down on my back and I reached up to thread my hand through his hair, cupping the back of his head as he sighed quietly.

"I like it when you're here," he whispered, his eyes still closed.

I smiled and leaned my forehead against his, gently scraping my nails against his scalp.

"Even when we're having a bad day?"

"Especially when we're having a bad day."

"Why's that?"

"Because you're here to work it out with me," he whispered again, his eyes slowly opening to mine.  "We knew it wasn't going to be easy and it isn't, but you keep staying."

"As long as you want me here."

"You're gonna be here for a while, then."  My heart fluttered and I squeezed his hand.  "Is that okay with you?"

"Yes," I whispered, nodding and closing my eyes.

"I'm sorry about yesterday morning."

"It's not your fault."

"It's not yours, either."  I opened my eyes again and bit my bottom lip.  "I shouldn't have reacted that way."

"You had every right to react that way.  I hurt you and you had every right to act the way you did."

"I hurt you, too.  I should've listened when you tried to explain it to me."

I sucked in a deep breath and leaned forward to brush the end of my nose against his, feeling better when he smiled lazily.

"Live and learn."

"I think we're gonna be doing a lot of that."

"I think so, too."

I leaned up and pressed my lips to his forehead, wrapping both of my arms around his neck as he let go of my hand to pull me against him tightly.  He buried his face in my throat and I tilted my head to rest my cheek on the top of his.

"You wanna talk about Rosalie?" he asked softly.

"Not right now."

"Do you think she'll be at dinner tonight?"

"Emmett said that he wouldn't let that happen.  He needs a few days to calm down so that he can talk to her rationally and he wants me to get a break, too."

"I'm going in to see about a bike tomorrow after work."  He shifted away from me slightly, tilting his head back to look at me.  "You wanna come?"

"Talked you into it, didn't he?"

He laughed and nodded, shrugging.

"I was going to get one anyway.  I'm just doing it sooner than anticipated."

"You can say no to him, you know."  I laughed and placed my hands on his cheeks.  "He may be big but he won't kill you for telling him no."

"I know.  We had a good time hanging out yesterday.  I enjoyed myself."

"Good.  I'm glad to hear that."

"Can I ask you a question?"

"Are you really gonna ask it or do I have to try reading your mind?"

He narrowed an eye at me and I grinned brightly at him, reaching up and pushing a few stray hairs off his forehead.

"Are either you or Carlisle related to Angela and Ben?"

"No, why?"

"They're coming to dinner tonight, right?"

I nodded.  "Yeah, why?"

"I thought this was a family thing?"

"Angela and Ben are family," I smiled, leaning in and resting my forehead against his.  "Ben works with Emmett and met Angela when Emmett had to come and see me at work for something.  Emmett met Rosalie the same day.  We're all connected and we all consider each other family."

"It's nice, isn't it?" he whispered, his eyes searching mine.

"What?"

"To have all of your closest… people right there all the time?  Knowing that they're always going to stand behind you; support you?  Love you?"

"You're a part of that now," I whispered back, once again threading my fingers in through his hair and closing my eyes.  "The minute you stepped over that threshold on your first day, you were officially a part of our family."

"Yeah?"

I opened my eyes and nodded, smiling when I saw the smirk on his face.

"Yes."

He hummed, pursing his lips and leaning forward to kiss me quickly and gently.  He hummed again, nodding before grinning wickedly and pulling me closer to him.

"So then… this would be incest."

"Edward!" I laughed, wiggling in his arms.

"Well!  It would be by your standards!"

"Then I guess we shouldn’t be together anymore."

I raised an eyebrow at him and he scrunched his face together, quickly shaking his head and burying his face in my throat again.

"No," he grumbled, whining.  "I don't like that idea at all."

"Then get that thought out of your head."

"Gone.  Promise."

He nuzzled his nose into my throat and I smiled, hitching a leg over his hip and sighing quietly.

"You have family here, Edward," I whispered into his hair, closing my eyes once more.  "Don't forget that, okay?"

"Okay," he mumbled, pressing his lips against my throat and lingering there.

"What did you wanna do before dinner?"

"I have to get some work done," he sighed heavily.

"You can drive me home, if you want, so that I don't distract you."

His arms tightened around me and he shook his head, placing an open-mouthed kiss over my collarbone.  I barely suppressed a shudder and bit my bottom lip, my eyes rolling in the back of my head.

Fuck if he wasn't good at that.

"You won't distract me," he mumbled, his tongue tracing my collarbone.

"I don't think I'm doing a very good job of not distracting you."

"Doesn't count.  I'm not working yet."

I took a deep breath and gently tugged on his hair, barely suppressing the laugh that made its way up my throat when he whined and grunted at me.

"You should get to it," I told him, smirking.  "I'll make breakfast?"

"In a hurry or something?"

"No."

"Why are you pushing me out?" he pouted.

"Because you've got things to get done today before we go to dinner."

"That's a whole…"  He shook his head and sighed, throwing one hand up in the air.  "A lot of hours away.  Just stay here with me for a little while longer."

He batted his eyes at me and pushed his bottom lip out, sniffling dramatically.  I laughed and plunged my face into his neck, tightening my hold around him and breathing out a contented sigh.  He hummed in appreciation and his arms were once again around my waist, his hands making smooth motions over my back.  We stayed there for at least another hour, lazily running our hands over each other and barely speaking, choosing to revel in the silence and the comfort until he groaned and shifted.

"Hm?" I managed, yawning.

"I have really gotta use the bathroom."

I snorted and laughed, shaking my head and looking up to press a kiss against his chin before rolling away.

"Are you still up for making me coffee?"

I looked over at him and shrugged, smirking.

"I guess so."

He hummed and sat up on his elbow, leaning over and placing a kiss firmly against my lips before rolling away and climbing off the bed.  I watched as he stretched, his arms over his head and his back slightly arched before he dug his hands into his hair and scratched.  I smiled as he padded out of the bedroom and listened as the bathroom door closed.  I yawned and stretched, flattening my hands on the headboard before I rolled out of bed and ran a hand through my hair as I walked out of the bedroom and into the kitchen.

I would deal with the shit in my head when I was sitting in the therapist's office with a mound of tissues in my lap and my heart on my sleeve.  Until then, I was going to live in the moment with Edward the way he'd asked me to and I was going to do my best to enjoy every second of it.

It was impossible to know when it would all be ripped away from me.  It undoubtedly would be, because that's the way my life worked but until then, I was going to try really hard to be myself and be the girl that Edward really deserved to have in his life.  I didn't want to be a failure anymore; I didn't want to fail him anymore.  I would do whatever I could to keep him for as long as possible.

~*~

"You need to relax," I laughed as Edward pulled into the driveway of my mom's house.  "You already know everyone here."

"I don't know your mother," he said quickly, his eyes wide as he stared at the house and shoved the car into park.

"She won't kill you."

"She might!"

"Edward," I sighed dramatically, leaning my elbow on the console between the seats and looking over at him.  "You need to calm down."

"Have you even told her that you're dating me yet?  Is she going to cut my head off or beat me with something because she doesn't know?"

"I'm pretty sure she knows.  I haven't told her."  I bit my bottom lip when his eyes got even wider in an attempt not to laugh at him.  "But I know that Carlisle has."

"Why didn't you tell her?  Isn't that something you should've told her?  Bella, she's gonna kill me!"

I tilted my head and reached up to run my hand through his hair, watching as his chest heaved up and down with each breath he took and his eyes darted from one part of the house to the other.

We'd spent most of the morning in the living room; me watching bad television and him working on charts as he absently rubbed circles into the arches of my feet.  He'd driven me almost to the point where I was going to attack him if he didn't stop and I was pretty sure that he didn't even realize it.

"Why do you think she's going to kill you?"

"I don't know!" he huffed, shaking his head.

I rested my head against the headrest and my hand on the back of his neck, pursing my lips and watching as he continued to breathe heavily and look around frantically.  You think I'd just threatened him with a guillotine or something to that effect.  He'd been fine all morning and the rest of the afternoon.  He'd never mentioned anything about being nervous about this dinner and I didn't quite understand where the nerves had come from now.

"Edward," I said softly, rubbing my thumb in circles underneath his ear.

"What?"

"Look at me."

He slowly turned to look at me, his eyes still wide and terrified and I felt a twinge of sympathy run through me.  If the roles were reversed, I'd be just as nervous and scared as Edward was.

"My mom is not a scary person.  No, I didn't tell her and I'll be the one to get hell for that, but it will have nothing to do with you.  Okay?"  He nodded slowly and I watched his throat move as he swallowed.  "Calm down."

"I've never had to… I always knew…"

It finally clicked.  He'd never had to meet parents before because he'd always known Lauren's parents.  He'd grown up with her; her parents were probably better than his own and he'd never had to worry about it.

I unbuckled my seat belt and leaned over, kissing him softly.

"It's okay," I whispered, backing away from him.

He huffed out a breath and nodded, kissing me again before unbuckling his seat belt.  I sat back in my seat and opened the door, climbing out and closing it behind me.  I waited for him at the hood of the car, holding my hand out to him when he finally made it out.  He grabbed it quickly, intertwining our fingers and squeezing tightly.

"Should we have brought something?  Should I have brought something? Wine?  Anything?"

I laughed and started to pull him in the direction of the porch, shaking my head.

"Mom doesn't drink and we don't need to bring anything, no.  Stop worrying."

"Easy for you to say," he grumbled as we walked up the few steps to the front door.

I rolled my eyes and smirked, squeezing his hand again and pushing through the door.  I immediately smelled pot roast and moaned, tilting my head back and shedding my coat.  Edward did the same and I hung both of them on the peg behind the door, toeing off my shoes and walking to the middle of the room.  Edward was immediately at my side, sans shoes, with his hand on the small of my back.

"Mom!" I called out, walking through the kitchen.  "Hello?"

"Isabella Marie!"

"Oh that can't be good," Edward mumbled.

I snorted and followed her voice into the extra bedroom she'd converted into the computer room, finding her sitting at the computer with her eyes glued to the screen.

"I think there's something you haven't told me."

She pursed her lips and raised an eyebrow, tearing her eyes from the screen and pushing the keyboard in as she turned to us.

"Mom, this is Edward Masen."  I grabbed his arm and pulled him into full view, grinning brightly at her.  "My boyfriend."

She stood up, grinning at him and pushing me out of the way to wrap her arms around his neck, hugging him tightly.  I snorted at the panicked look on his face, crossing my arms over my chest and pressing my lips together.  He laughed nervously and loosely wrapped his arms around her waist.

"It's nice to meet you," she said politely before stepping back from him and rounding on me.  "Not that my daughter told me beforehand!"

"I've been busy!"

"Excuses, excuses."

Her lips twitched and she laughed, throwing her arms around me and hugging me tightly.  I laughed and did the same, hugging her back and burying my face into her shoulder.

"He's hot, honey," she whispered into my ear.

I threw my head back and laughed loudly, noisily kissing her cheek before I stepped back and nodded.

"Yeah."

"Everyone else said they'd be here around six or so," she stated, looking between us and clasping her hands together.  "I understand Rose isn't coming."

I hummed and shook my head, crossing my arms over my chest and looking down at my feet.

"We had a bit of a falling out yesterday and Emmett told her not to come."

"I heard," she nodded, her jaw tense as she crossed her arms over her stomach.  "You should've told your brother sooner."

"He was happy with her, mom.  I wasn't going to ruin that."

She sighed heavily and looked over at Edward, jutting a thumb at me.

"She's infuriating sometimes, isn't she?"

"Uh," he stuttered, laughing nervously and stuffing his hands in his pockets.  "I, uhm…"

I laughed and walked over to him, shaking my head and gently pulling on his shirt.

"Relax," I whispered.

"I don't bite!" my mother declared happily.

I snorted and leaned forward, resting my forehead on Edward's chest and shaking my head.

"Is there anything we can do to help you, mom?" I asked innocently, looking over at her.

"No, not really."  She shook her head and plopped back down into the computer chair.  "I've got everything under control."

"Are you sure?"

She nodded enthusiastically, waving us off as she pulled the keyboard back out.

"Go relax.  Watch TV or something.  No humping in my house!" she declared, one of her arms above her head as she turned back to the screen.

"Oh, Christ," I moaned, laughing as I pushed Edward backward.

His face was pale and his mouth was hanging open, his eyes as wide as ever as he let me push him back out into the hallway.

"We're a very open family," I explained, laughing and licking my lips as he stared over my head.

"I guess," he managed, his voice hoarse.

I leaned forward and rested my chin on his chest, looking up at him and watching as he kept his eyes trained on the doorway behind me.

"You gonna look at me at all for the rest of the day?"

He looked down at me and grabbed one of my hands, placing it over his rapidly beating heart and offering me a small, nervous smile.

"Edward," I whispered, standing up straight.

"I've never… Bella, this is all new to me and I just… I don't wanna screw it up."

"You won't.  It's physically impossible to screw this up."

"Give me ten minutes," he breathed.  "I'm sure I'll figure out a way."

I twisted my lips to the side before moving my hand from his chest and walking back into the computer room.

"What're you looking for?" my mother asked absently.

"My… thing," I mumbled, yanking open the closet door and sinking to my knees.

"That narrows it down."

"Hush."

I pushed things out of the way, shaking my head at the bin full of wrapping paper for various events before finally finding the black case that I was looking for.  I dragged it out, grunting as I stood up and closed the closet doors.  I smiled brightly at my mother before wiggling my fingers at her and walking back out of the room.  I grabbed Edward's hand, pulling him back down the hallway and into the living room, plopping down on the couch and looking up at him.  He sat down next to me, his hand still in mine as he pulled it into his lap and stroked his thumb over the back of it.  I hefted the bag onto my lap, looking over at him and licking my lips.

"This is my portfolio," I said quietly.

He looked down at the shoulder bag in my lap before looking back at me, nodding slowly.

"Yeah?"

I nodded and shook my hand out of his, flipping open the clasps on the bag and pulling out the expensive black portfolio that I hadn't changed since I'd left college.  I pushed the bag off my lap and turned to face him completely, handing it to him.  He took it, placing it on his lap and opening it.  I grabbed the ribbon on the side, showing him how to pull out the matted prints before letting it go and sliding back on the couch.  I clasped my hands between my knees and pressed my lips together, watching from the corner of my eye as he turned prints over.

He'd read the letter that I wrote to Mike and that had been as personal as I could ever get.  But this was something different; this was what I worked my ass off on and something that was almost as personal as that letter.  I could only hope that he'd accept it and understand how absolutely personal it was.  I didn't think much of the photographs in that portfolio; in fact, I hated most of them.  But there were the two or three that I was incredibly proud of that had somehow managed to strip me bare and he'd see that.  If I knew him like I think I did, he'd see everything that I'd ever tried hiding from anyone outside of my family and I prayed to God that he'd accept it.

I looked over at him as he snapped the portfolio closed, his head tilted at me as he rested his arms on the top of it and smirked at me.

"You are very talented, Bella," he said softly.  "Every single one of these is great."

"No, they're really not.  You don't have to say…"

He leaned over, his lips against mine, effectively shutting me up.  He scooted closer to me, one of his hands coming up to rest on my cheek as he worked his bottom lip in between mine and sucked my top lip into his mouth.  I moaned quietly and placed my hand on his wrist, squeezing it as I traced my tongue over his lip.

"Hey now!  That's not something I needed to see!"

I sighed heavily as Edward immediately sat back from me, his hands flat on the cover of my portfolio as he stared wide-eyed at my grinning brother in the doorway.  Any other time, he could be heard from miles away and I'd have a slight warning.  This time, when I really didn't want to be interrupted, he's as quiet as a fucking mouse.

"You need bells or something," I grumbled.

"Bells?  For what?"

"So that I can hear you when you're interrupting me."

He laughed loudly and walked over to us, plopping down in between us and slinging an arm over my shoulders.

"What fun is that?"

I sighed heavily and leaned against him, smirking as he immediately wrapped his arm around me and squeezed tightly.

"You okay?" I asked softly, looking up at him.

He smiled slightly at me and nodded.

"I will be.  And you need to speak up sometimes, Bella.  That wasn't fair."

"You've been with her for three and a half years, Emmett."

"And I've known you for twenty-two.  You always come first."

"But you were gonna…"

"Yeah," he said quickly, shaking his head and briefly closing his eyes.  "Things change sometimes."

"Emmett…"

"She gave me a lot to think about, Bells.  And I'm doing a lot of thinking, which you should not be worrying about."  He turned to Edward, nodding at my portfolio and I pursed my lips, huffing.  "What did you think?"

"I think your sister is very talented."

"Try telling her that."

Edward snorted and I peeked around Emmett, playfully narrowing my eyes at him.  He did the same back at me, even going so far as to stick his tongue out at me and causing me to throw my head back in laughter.

"You two are disgusting," he mumbled, shaking his head and hefting himself off the couch.  "I'm going to bug mom."

He walked out without waiting for an answer from either of us and I immediately lay down, waiting for Edward to set my portfolio off to the side before I rested my head in his lap and looked up at him.  He placed one hand on the top of my head and the other on my stomach as he looked down at me.

"Have you ever thought about writing again?" he asked softly.

I shrugged one shoulder, pursing my lips.

"I'm always thinking about it."

"You have ideas?"

I nodded, closing my eyes and humming.

"Always have ideas."

"Why don't you write some down?"

I shrugged.

"I don't know.  Never had the time, I guess."

"Hm."

"What?"

I opened my eyes, looked up at him, watching as he pursed his lips, and shook his head as he grinned down at me.

"Nothing."

"Should I be scared?"

"No."

I nodded, eyeing him before closing my eyes again and wiggling a little.

"All right then."

"Are you staying with me again tonight?" he asked softly, running his hand over the top of my head.

"I should go home."

"Mm," he grumbled.  "Why?"

I opened my eyes again and smirked, reaching up and placing one hand on his cheek, rubbing my thumb over the bridge of his nose.

"You might get tired of me."

"Oh, I doubt that."

"Absence makes the heart grow fonder."

"Are you trying to get rid of me?"

I laughed and shook my head.

"Never."

"Then stay with me tonight, Bella," he whispered, his hand splaying out on my stomach and slowly inching my shirt up.  "I like having you there.  I like falling asleep with you."

My breath caught in my throat and I sat up a little, quickly pressing my lips to his.

"You always know what to say, don't you?" I whispered as I backed away from him and fell back into his lap.

"It's always the truth.  I'd never lie to you."

I sat up completely and crawled into his lap, framing his face with my hands.  He smirked, all of his nerves seemingly gone as he wrapped his arms around me.

"That means more to me than anything," I said softly.

"Well, I've learned that you don't screw over the important people in your life.  And right now, you are the most important person in my life."

"You're just full of the right words today, aren't you?"

"Right or wrong, I mean them."

I leaned in, kissing him softly and wrapping my arms around his neck.  His hands trailed up my back, flattening against my shoulder blades and pulling me closer.

"Hey, now!" Emmett yelled again.

I huffed against Edward's mouth and slowly pulled back from him, looking over to glare at my younger brother.  He merely grinned and plopped down into the armchair next to us, snatching the television remote and flicking it on.

"Bells," I grumbled.  "You're getting them for Christmas."

"There's a game on," he said absently, ignoring me.  "You interested in watching, Edward?"

"Hell yes."

I sighed heavily, defeated as I kissed him again and climbed off his lap.  He grabbed my hand and brought it to his lips, his eyes on mine as he kissed my knuckles.  Sparks that I thought I'd be used to by now shot up through my arm and, interestingly enough, straight down between my legs.  I bit my bottom lip and dragged the back of my pointer finger over his chin before he let me go.

"Who're you going for?" Emmett asked, completely oblivious to the way I wanted to jump Edward whether he was in the room or not.

"Giants," he answered immediately, dropping my hand and leaning around me to see the television.

I rolled my eyes, hiding a smirk and put my portfolio back together, stuffing it in its case before walking out and back to the computer room.  My mom was still sitting at the computer and merely slid a glance over at me as I put the bag back into the closet and plopped down on the extra bed behind me.

"So?" she asked slowly.

"He's talking sports with Emmett."

"I don't care about that," she huffed, turning in the chair and eyeing me.  "Give me details, girl!"

I laughed and slid back on the bed, curling my legs underneath me and propping my elbows on my knees.

"Like what?"

"First of all, why the hell did it take you so damn long to tell me?"

"Because it just happened the day before yesterday?"

"More than enough time to call your lonely old mother and fill her in."  She batted her eyes at me, tilting her head and pushing her bottom lip out in a pout.  "I had to hear it from Carlisle."

"Things have been crazy," I said quietly, dragging my teeth along my bottom lip.  "I'm amazed that he's even here right now."

She immediately popped up from the computer chair and walked over to me, sitting behind me.  I turned to her, resting my head against her shoulder as she wrapped her arms tightly around my shoulders and leaned her head against the top of mine.

"What happened, baby?"

"We were… together," I mumbled, fiddling with my hands.  "And I had a dream of Mike the same night."

She whistled out a low breath and I huffed.

"It wasn't like the other ones.  I actually talked to him this time."

"What'd he tell you?"

"Everything I'd wanted to hear."

"That's bad?"

"I still miss him," I whispered, guilt clutching my heart.

"Baby, you're going to," she whispered, one of her hands coming up to smooth down my hair.  "And I'm sure Edward understands that."

"Yeah."

"Mike would want you to be happy and if you're happy with Edward, then why question it?  You've gotta learn to just be, little girl."

"I'm trying," I breathed out on a laugh.  "I'm calling about going back to therapy tomorrow.  Edward said he'd go with me when the time came."

She hummed in appreciation and I smirked, closing my eyes and breathing evenly as we listened to Emmett scream at the television.  I heard Edward laugh nervously and I snorted, shaking my head.

"He needs to relax," she declared.

I laughed and wrapped my arms around her waist, all but curling into her lap and burying my face in her neck.

"He was fine all day and the minute we pulled into the driveway, you think that I'd just told him that he was being sent to the shooting range or something."

"Ah, men," she sighed, pressing a quick kiss to the top of my head before pulling away from me.  "Come help me put the extra leaf in the table.  I'm not used to all of these guests for Sunday dinner."

"My love life is apparently a monumental occasion."

She laughed and got off the bed, shaking her head and pointing at me over her shoulder as she started out of the room.

"You're just universally loved," she quipped.

I snorted again and got off the bed, walking behind her and standing in the dining room, looking in to the living room to see Edward with his elbows resting on his knees as he leaned in towards the television.  I hooked my thumbs into my jean pockets and tilted my head at him, smiling.  He looked over at me and sat up straight, grinning crookedly at me as Emmett continued to scream at the television.  I placed my fingertips over my lips and he grinned, winking at me before his attention was once again stolen by the game on television.

I smirked and shook my head before walking to the table and pulling off the tablecloth.  I raised an eyebrow when I saw my mother standing in front of me, the extra leaf leaning against her stomach as she crossed her arms over her chest and smirked at me.

"What?"

She merely shook her head and held her hands up at her sides.

"He makes you happy," she said quietly, tilting her head in the direction of the living room.  "It's easy and nice to see, Bella, that's all."

My face burned and I shrugged one shoulder as I draped the cloth over one of the chairs and walked to one end of the table.

"Yeah."

He did.  And right now, that was all that should matter.  I was about to be surrounded by the people I considered family, here to either embarrass the hell out of me in front of Edward with stories that I never wanted him to hear or question him relentlessly about things that were only important to them.  Either way, for the first time in a long time, I was content.

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