Nineteen

*Edward*
I was elbow-deep in soapy water, eyeing Bella as she stood next to me after a suspicious amount of water made its way onto the front of my shirt.  She was humming innocently as she meticulously washed off a dinner plate, her hips swinging side to side.
Dinner was over and after an interesting story about how Bella had smacked her face on the side of the microwave in an attempt to kick Emmett in the head, I'd somehow gotten roped into doing the dishes that couldn't fit into the dishwasher.  Bella, taking pity on me, had offered to help me and I'd been extremely thankful when I saw the pile that had accumulated there the minute everyone was out of their seats.
Dinner with everyone was an affair on its own.  Carlisle, Esme, Jasper and Alice had shown up at the same time, Ben and Angela following shortly after.  The previously semi-quiet house quickly turned into a loud one, with everyone talking at once about everything that had happened in between the twelve or so hours that we hadn't seen or talked to each other.  I hadn't seen Bella so carefree or laugh as much as she had since I'd seen her with Emmett at the coffee house and I loved it.
I'd been easily included in all conversations, finally realizing that I knew these people.  I worked with them and just because I was now dating one of their own – their family member – didn't change the fact that I still saw them on a daily basis.  It was still slightly nerve-wracking to see Carlisle, Esme and Renee whispering to each other, looking over at me and clearly debating about whatever it was that parents thought when their daughter brought a new boy home, but it wasn't horrible.  Emmett kept me talking about the game that we'd watched, Jasper argued with him about whether or not the winning touchdown had been legal while Ben just shook his head and watched the three of us.  Alice, Angela and Bella talked about the Christmas Eve party that was underway, all of them having some sort of differing opinion about decorations and music choices.  I'd felt included and Bella's words about me being a part of their family were finally starting to make a little sense.
"Yes?" she asked slowly, looking over at me and poorly trying to fight off a grin.
"You got me wet."
"No."  She licked her lips and shook her head.  "You have that backwards."
"What are you talking about?  I've barely moved my…"
I blinked at her as she raised an eyebrow, grinning at me and gently bumping her hips against mine.  My mouth dropped open and my pants tightened simultaneously.  Did she really…?  Oh my fuck.
She wiggled her eyebrows at me and went back to washing her dish, carefully placing it in the drainer on the counter next to her.
Was this still my Bella?  It still looked like her, but she'd never said anything like that before.  Okay, yeah, our physical relationship had really just started, but I'd never pictured her saying…
Fuck, what was I complaining about?
"So," I managed, clearing my throat and going back to my own dish.  "How soon can we get out of here?"
Her hand brushed mine in the water and she linked our pinkies together.
"Soon, I hope."
I barely stifled a moan and squeezed her pinkie, forcing deep breaths in through my nose.  I gently tugged and she moved closer to me, sliding her hand completely into mine.
"Soon would be good," I breathed, nodding.
"Edward!" Renee exclaimed, walking into the kitchen with a covered container.  "Take a walk with me, would you?"
Erection: gone.
"What's that, mom?" Bella asked innocently, looking over her shoulder and squeezing my hand once.
"Chicken bones.  I'm babysitting Sam and you know how he likes to get into the garbage."
Bella shook her head, laughing and I looked over at her, confused.
"Neighbor's dog," Renee stated as she set the container on the counter and grabbed her coat, seeming to sense my confusion.  "Phil's got to work late tomorrow night and he asked me to watch him until he gets home.  I have to bury these so that he doesn't get in the garbage when I'm not looking and choke on them."  She bent down and pulled her shoes on, shaking her hair out of her face.  "I wouldn't want to kill the damn thing and I want to do this before it gets too dark out."
"Where's he off to this time?"
"Someplace up north."  She waved a hand absently at her side, shaking her head.  "His guys won something and they're up against… some other team up… there."
She pointed up to the ceiling and shrugged.
"It's good that you know, mom," Bella laughed, shaking her head.
"Isn't it?" she chirped brightly, grabbing the container from the counter and waiting for me.
I squeezed Bella's hand once more, swallowing hard before pulling my hands out of the water and grabbing a hand towel from the cabinet below the sink, quickly drying my hands and rolling my sleeves back down my arms.
"We'll be back soon!" Renee chirped, waiting for me to grab my coat and sling it over my shoulders.
She opened the door and I walked over to Bella again, kissing her quickly before shoving my hands in my pockets, ducking my head and walking up behind Renee.  The door slammed shut behind me and I swallowed hard.  Bella had been my safety net all damn night and now, I was walking away from it.  That hadn't been a part of the plan.  I was supposed to stay by her side and she was supposed to protect me from the questions I was sure her mother had for me.
"We just have to walk over the hill."  Renee pointed to a bunch of trees behind a shed at the edge of the driveway.  "Not too far."
"Okay," I replied, chewing on the inside of my cheek.
"I'm sure you know there's a reason that I had you come with me," she started, looking over at me.
"I figured as much."
"Has Bella told you about her father?"
I nodded, shoving my hands into my pockets and hunching my shoulders, staring down at the ground as we walked.
"He didn't want her."
My head snapped up and I looked over at her, my eyes wide.
"He wanted a boy.  Wouldn't even hold her after she was born.  My brother had to throw her at him and pray that he caught her."  She breathed out a laugh and shook her head.  "I wanted to murder him."
"He didn't… he didn't want her?"
Renee shook her head, pressing her lips together and shaking her head.
"He wouldn't get up with her in the middle of the night or anything.  Said that he'd worked hard all day and was too tired to get up.  Because God knows I did nothing all day but take care of her; I was more than awake enough to get up."  She huffed out a breath and shook her head again.  "By the time Emmett was one, he decided that he didn't want to be a father anymore and he took off.  He didn't try to be in their lives and only showed up when they graduated high school or got a new job that would make him look good.  She resents him and prefers to not be associated with him."
"I don't blame her."
"He started her issues with men and she hasn't had such good luck so far."  She stopped, grabbing my arm and pulling me to a stop as well.  "I'm asking you now, Edward; are you serious about her?"
"Yes," I said automatically, nodding once.  "I'm not trying to fuck with her head or do anything to hurt her.  I just wanna be with her."
"You don't have an easy road ahead of you."
"No part of this has really been easy."
"Then why are you sticking around?"
Well, at least she didn't beat around the bush.
"She's the only one that makes me feel anything again."  I shrugged one shoulder uncomfortably, looking down at my feet.  "I can't really explain it."
"You have the patience of a saint," she said quietly.
I shrugged again, licking my lips and looking up at her.
"I don't really know what to say to you.  I don't know why I've stuck around through all of it.  I don't know why I stayed when I should've disappeared a while ago.  I just know that I feel something for your daughter that I never felt with my ex-fiancĂ©e and I'm in no hurry to lose it."
She tapped her fingertips against the side of the container in her hand, her lips pursed as she eyed me.  I kept my gaze locked with hers despite my raging heartbeat, fearing that I might've said something wrong and proved to Bella that I really could fuck up something like this easily.
"Okay," she said simply, nodding and squeezing my arm.
She turned and started in the direction she'd pointed at before, leaving me gaping behind her.
"Come on!" she exclaimed, laughing as she reached the edge of the shed and turned back to me.  "You can dig the hole."
"You aren't going to threaten me or anything?" I asked, slowly starting back towards her.
I figured that I'd get some kind of lecture and expected to be asked fifteen thousand questions about what my intentions were towards her daughter.  She had to be father and mother to both of her children for the majority of their lives and I just expected… more.  Not that I was complaining about that, either.  She already made me nervous – she was one of the most important and influential people in Bella's life – and I was expecting some grand ass ripping from her the minute we were alone.  I wasn't entirely sure what to do now that I realized it wasn't going to happen.
She laughed and shook her head, shrugging as she hugged the container to her chest.
"You haven't given me a reason not to trust you.  Bella obviously does."  She nodded towards the house, a small smile playing on her lips.  "That's good enough for me."
"Thank you, Renee," I said quietly as I walked up next to her.
"You're welcome, Edward."  She dug around in her coat pocket, producing a garden shovel and handing it to me.  "Let's get to it, shall we?"
I smirked and nodded, taking the shovel from her and walking with her again.  We talked idly about everything – she predicted that there would be a huge snowstorm by the end of the week because her knee was killing her.  After my completely baffled look, she explained that she'd been thrown from her horse when she was sixteen and had to have it completely reworked.  When the weather changed, she knew about it more than anyone else did.
When the bones were sufficiently covered underneath dirt and leaves, we started back towards the house.  I watched as the door opened and immediately smiled when I saw Bella walk out on the porch, leaning on the railing and smirking at me.
"That's why you weren't threatened," Renee said quietly into my ear before we reached the porch.  "Dessert?"
"Nah," Bella smiled, her eyes still on me as she shook her head.  "I think we're gonna get going, mom."
Renee hummed, walking up the steps and slapping Bella's ass before pushing open the door.  Bella laughed and looked over her shoulder, wiggling her ass at her mother's retreating back.
"Did you tell everyone goodbye yet?"
"We'll be in soon."
She hummed again, looking over her shoulder and pursing her lips before closing the door behind her.  I laughed at them and walked to the bottom step, setting the garden shovel off to the side and looking up at her.  She grinned down at me, propping her chin on her fist.
"She's not so bad, huh?"
"A lot like you," I stated, nodding.
"What'd you talk about?"
"You.  Your father."
She stood up straight immediately, her hands falling to the railing as she pursed her lips and tilted her head back slightly.
"Oh?"
I stepped over the small line of rocks that was meant to be a garden fence of sorts, praying that Renee didn't have any plants that I'd be killing when she wanted them to pop up again in spring, and reached up to grab her hands.  She stiffly linked her fingers with mine, her entire body obviously tense.
"You already told me, Bella," I said softly.
"She told you more."
"Yes."
I watched her face transform from the stone it had been to one of pure and absolute pain and regret that I didn't understand.  Just as quickly as I'd seen it, it was gone and she was shaking her head with her eyes closed.
"Are you ready to go?" she asked quietly.
I kept my grip on her hand as I walked out of the garden and up the steps, standing in front of her and gently pressing her against the railing.  Her eyes slowly opened to me and I leaned down, resting my forehead against hers.
"I want you," I whispered.
"Then we should get going."
Her voice was low and even slightly detached, her eyes dull and the complete opposite of what they should be when she said a sentence like that.
"No."  I closed my eyes and huffed out a breath, smirking.  That hadn't really worked the way I wanted it to.  "He didn't want you.  I do."
I opened my eyes and looked directly into hers.  She was just staring and blinking slowly at me, her breathing starting to pick up.
Too much.  Christ, Masen, too much.
"I just… that's what… I don't want you to…"
"Shut up," she breathed finally, her hand squeezing mine tightly.
I snapped my mouth shut and bit the inside of my cheek, swallowing hard.
You need to learn to keep your mouth shut sometimes, moron.
She opened her mouth and then snapped it shut, her chest starting to heave against mine and her grip tightening on my hand.  I kept watching her, keeping my eyes connected with hers and doing my best to wait patiently as she continued to stare back at me.  She finally closed her eyes and pressed her lips together tightly, shaking her head.
"No one's ever…"  She shook her head again, her tongue coming out to lick her bottom lip.  "You are the first person," she started, whispering, "to ever say that to me."
"Is that bad?" I whispered back, reaching up with my free hand to place it on her cheek.
Her lips quirked up into a smirk and she shook her head once more, finally opening her eyes.
"I don't know."  She breathed out a laugh, leaning her head against my hand.  "But I fucking love it."
I grinned and leaned in, kissing her softly.  She shook her hand from mine, stepping up on her toes and wrapping her arms around my neck.  I wrapped my arms around her waist, pulling her against me and letting a breathy moan escape as she purposely rolled her hips against mine.
It was absolutely amazing how easily she could turn me on after I just spent fifteen minutes with her mother.
"I want all of you, Bella," I whispered, breaking away from her to trail my lips down to her neck.  "Every single part of you; including the crazy parts.  I want it."
Her hands moved up to my hair, her fingers threading in through the strands as she let her head roll back on her shoulders.  I kissed around to her throat, trailing my lips up and onto her chin.
"We should go," she managed, pulling her head back up and connecting her lips to mine again.
"Mhmm," I hummed, opening my mouth and tracing her top lip with my tongue.
"Come on," she breathed, pulling away from me.  "We need to say goodbye."
I pouted and huffed, kissing her once more before stepping back from her and grabbing her hand again.  She walked in front of me, pushing open the door and leading us into the kitchen.
"Do you mind if we stop at my place real quick?"
"For what?"
"I need clothes."
"Nah," I smiled, shaking my head.  "Just stay home with me tomorrow and we'll be naked all day."
She laughed, throwing her head back and squeezing my hand as we walked into the dining room.
"Not gonna happen."
I sighed dramatically and followed her into the living room where everyone had convened after dinner was over.  They all looked up at us, their conversations immediately dying out and I swallowed nervously.
That wasn't obvious at all.
"We're gonna get going," Bella announced, squeezing my hand.
Renee was the first one out of her seat, her arms around Bella tightly.  I stepped back from them, my hand slowly drifting out of Bella's grasp as I watched everyone say goodbye to her.  Emmett reminded me about looking at a bike tomorrow and I told him that I remembered, laughing as Renee rolled her eyes and slapped him on the back of the head for reasons that I don't think I'd fully understand.  Alice said something about coming over early to help decorate for the Christmas Eve party – which I realized was only a week away – and Bella nodded, sighing heavily.  I smirked and stifled a laugh when Emmett snorted and mentioned something about Bella having better luck with wrapping herself in lights than hanging them up on the wall.  And when Bella told him that he was getting coal as his Christmas gift, it was pretty damn impossible not to laugh.
It took us twenty minutes to get out of the house without someone shouting something else that spurred us all into another conversation.  We finally made it out of the house and I dug around in my jacket pocket for my keys, watching Bella out of the corner of my eye as she sashayed her way to the passenger side of the car.  The way her hips swayed as she did so had my mouth watering and my pants getting that much tighter around my hips.  I walked up behind her, turning her around and pinning her against the door of the car, my keys uncomfortably digging into my palm.  She pursed her lips and raised her eyebrows at me, tilting her head to the side.
"Yes?"
"You're doing this shit on purpose, aren't you?" I breathed, leaning in and trailing my lips along the edge of her jaw.
"Doing what?" she asked innocently, her hands maddeningly staying at her sides.
"You know what."
"I have no idea what you're talking about, Edward."
"Oh, no?" I mumbled against her skin, trailing my lips up to her ear.
"Nope."
I pushed my hips against hers and grinned into her skin when I heard her sharp intake of breath.
"Liar," I whispered, pulling the bottom of her ear into my mouth.
She hummed, her hands finally coming up and resting on my chest, her fingers curling into my shirt as she tilted her head to the side.
"Are you two actually gonna leave sometime soon or just spend the night standing outside?"
I quickly backed away and looked up at the porch to see Ben and Angela standing there, shit-eating grins clearly visible on their faces even in the fast-approaching darkness.
"Go Bella, go Bella," Angela chanted, swaying her hips from side-to-side.
"Bella?  Hell, it looked like it was all Edward!"
"Oh good Christ," Bella laughed, leaning forward and burying her face in her hands.
"Bella started it!" I exclaimed.
She laughed loudly and dropped her hands from her face when I turned to look at her.
"You didn't seem to mind!" she exclaimed.
"I wasn't complaining," I said simply, nodding my head at her once.  "Just stating a fact."
"Ass," she mumbled, playfully narrowing an eye at me.
"You don't seem to mind it much."
"Emmett's right," Ben laughed, suddenly next to us.  "You two are sickening."
"How many times has he said that today?" Bella laughed, shaking her head.
"At least a hundred," Angela chirped, smiling brightly.  "See you guys tomorrow."
We nodded, once again saying goodbye and watching as they got into their car.
"So… your place?" I asked, looking over at her.
"Just for clothes."  She stepped up to me, pressing her chest to mine and licking her bottom lip.  My fucking knees almost buckled.  "Then to yours."
I nodded frantically, swallowing hard and moaning softly as she dragged her hand firmly over the front of my jeans.
Fuck, I really liked it when she was like this.
"Yeah," I breathed, reaching behind her and yanking on the door handle.
My eyebrows pulled together in confusion when it didn't open and Bella laughed.  I pursed my lips at her and brought my keys up, forcefully pressing down on the unlock button and listening to the locks flip.
"Flustered?" she asked innocently.
I jumped when the horn of Ben's car sounded before they drove off down the road and she laughed at me again.
"Jumpy, too."
"Your fault," I grumbled, finally able to pull her door open for her.
"I'll be sure to keep my hands to myself, then."
She turned on her heel and I grabbed her around the waist, yanking her back to me and forcefully pressing my mouth on hers.
"Never," I mumbled, squeezing her waist before letting her go.  "Feel free to touch as much as you want to."
"Hm," she hummed, turning to get in the car.
She paused and her eyes raked over me, her bottom lip in between her teeth.  Every ounce of blood that might have been left in my brain immediately found its way to my groin.
"I'll remember that," she said simply before climbing in the car.
I shut the door automatically, damn near sprinting around to my side and flinging the door open.  I barely remembered starting the car or pulling out of the driveway.  It was even worse when Bella placed her hand on my thigh, slowly inching it up to where I needed her most.
She purposely kept her hand away from me for the entire ride, trailing it up and down my thigh as I drove as quickly as possible to her apartment complex.  I parked haphazardly in the spot her car was usually in and quickly unbuckled my seatbelt.  Before I could even comprehend anything, she was crawling over the center console and sliding into my lap, her hands in my hair and her lips on mine.  I moaned loudly, reaching up to run my hands up and down her forearms, opening my mouth to hers.  Her tongue quickly met mine and she rocked against me once, hissing as she hit her knee on the center console.
We were in my car.  In front of her apartment.  About to do something that would be a fuck ton easier in the bed hiding behind her front door.
"Bella," I breathed, pulling back from her and resting my hands on her hips.
She merely hummed at me and began kissing my neck, her hips slowly starting to move over mine.
"Bella, your apartment…"
"Ever christened the car, Edward?"
She fucking purred into my ear.  Purred.  Like a cat.  Like a very satisfied fucking cat who'd just eaten the proverbial goddamned canary.
It did insane things to me.
I huffed out a shaky breath and nodded, resting my head back against the seat.
"Yes."
"Oh."  I felt her lips purse more than normal against the skin on my neck before her tongue darted out and my eyes rolled into the back of my head.  "Well… we can make it better."
I laughed nervously, my fingertips digging into her hips as she dropped her hands from my hair, dragged them down my chest and easily slipped them underneath my shirt.
"Bella… we are ten feet from…"
"I want you here… like this," she whispered into my ear, dragging her fingernails across my stomach.
What in the fuck was I complaining about?  My girlfriend wanted me in the driver's seat of my car and I was trying to convince her to go inside?  There was something very wrong with me.
I lifted my head from the seat and opened my eyes, my hands trailing up under her shirt when movement on her doorstep caught my eye.
"There's someone on your front step," I said, my arms immediately around her waist and crushing her against me in some sort of caveman-like gesture of protection.
"Fuck 'em," she mumbled, her hands on the button of my jeans.
"No, Bella, seriously," I laughed, moving my arms to grab her hands and still their motions.
Every inch of me groaned at the loss of her touch and I sighed heavily, shaking my head once.  She huffed and turned slightly on my lap, her fingers curling around mine.
"Fuck," I hissed, my hips automatically lifting against hers.
"You wanted me to… oh my fuck," she breathed.
I felt every inch of her tense up and I was immediately on alert, narrowing my eyes at the dark figure hunched over on her step.
"What?  Do you know them?  Who is it?" I asked, leaning forward to look over her shoulder in a vain attempt at making out the person's face.
"It's Jake," she mumbled, turning back to look at me.
Her bottom lip was in her mouth and I narrowed my eyes, scowling.  I didn't like this shit; sitting on her goddamned front step and waiting for her like some fucking stalker wasn't anything I really fucking liked.
And what pissed me off even more was that he had the ability to ruin the entire night by just being there.  The last thing Bella had on her mind now was me and that on its own pissed me off.  Coupled with the fact that she'd jump through hoops for him no matter what he said to her or how he hurt her and I was ready to rip his throat out.  Everything had been going really damn well and now… now it was all shot to hell.
"How do you know it's him?"
"I just… I know it's him, Edward."
"How?"
"I've known him for five years.  I know him," she said softly.
"So what are we gonna do?" I asked after a few moments of silence, grinding my teeth together.
"You're gonna stay here and I'm going to see what he wants."
"I'm not staying here," I laughed sarcastically, shaking my head.  "No fucking way."
"Edward, if he just wants…"
"Boyfriend."  I pointed at myself and raised an eyebrow at her.  "Who hasn't met this asshole that had you all torn up."
"He's not… Edward, if you're going to insist on meeting him, you can't be a jackass."
I stared at her and she stared back, sitting up straight in my lap and raising an expectant eyebrow.
"Fine.  I'll be as nice as possible."
"Thank you," she said coolly, nodding her head once.
"You're welcome," I replied in the same tone, cocking an eyebrow at her and pushing open my door.
She huffed at me before crawling over me and stepping out of the car, running her hands through her hair before turning and walking towards her front door without even waiting for me.  I growled quietly at her back before I grabbed her neglected purse – it had been in the car ever since we left my apartment – and climbed out of the car, grumbling to myself.  I slammed the door a little harder than necessary before looking up to see that Jake was standing, his hands in his hair as he hovered over her.
My eyes narrowed as I forced myself to calmly walk up the pathway.
"I just wanna talk to you, Bells.  We need to get a few things out in the air."
"I've got plans for tonight," she said quietly.  "Can we do it some other time?"
"Apparently you've got plans every night, Bella.  Do you ever turn your damn phone on anymore?"
"I've… Jake," she sighed heavily, reaching up to rub her forehead.
"Here, Bella," I said quietly, handing her purse to her and placing my hand on the small of her back.
Jake looked up at me, his eyes narrowed as he shoved his hands in his pockets while Bella took her purse from me.
"Something you need?" he growled.
"Jake," Bella hissed, reaching out and smacking his shoulder with her free hand.  "Enough."
"I'm Edward Masen," I said, forcing myself to be civil.  "Bella's boyfriend."
His eyes widened and snapped to her.
"What?"
"You haven't been around," she sighed, throwing one hand in the air.
"This is pretty fucking big, Bella!"
She stared at him and I watched her, my jaw clenched as I wondered why in the fuck she had to defend herself to this asshole and why she was just standing here and letting him fucking talk to her this way.
"I'm not apologizing," she said firmly, squaring her shoulders.  "I needed time, you gave it to me and I appreciate that but it's not like I was going to sit around the whole time."  She reached behind her and grabbed my hand, linking our fingers together and pulling my arm around her waist.  "Edward is the only thing in my life right now that makes any sense.  You accept that or there's no reason for you to be here anymore."
He looked between the two of us, his nostrils flaring before he huffed and his shoulders slumped.  He turned to me, his eyes still slightly narrowed and I tightened my hold around Bella's waist.
"Nice to meet you," he grumbled.
"You too," I grumbled back.
"Where's Jean?" Bella asked quietly.
"At home."  He turned back to her and sighed, his eyes softening as he looked at her.  "I would really like to talk to you, Bella."
She looked up at me and I sighed, shrugging and trying to offer her some sort of a smile.  I didn't like it, didn't want to leave her here with him, but I didn't have much of a choice.  She still considered him her best friend and they needed to work this out before things got too much worse between them.  Just because I knew that and could understand why this needed to happen now didn't mean that I liked it any more than I'd liked it when she flew out of the car.
She smiled weakly back at me before turning back to Jake and handing him her purse.
"My keys are in there.  I'll be in soon."
He nodded, taking her purse and easily unzipping the top to find her keys.  We both watched as he unlocked her front door and walked in, flipping on lights before closing the door behind him.  I stared at the closed door, my eyebrows pulled together as I wondered why he seemed so nonchalant about digging around in her purse.
She turned to me completely, her arms wrapping around my waist and her face buried in my chest.  I sighed heavily and wrapped my arms around her shoulders, burying my nose in the top of her head as I held on tightly.
"Sorry," she mumbled.
"Don't apologize.  You need to work it out with him."
I hated that.  I hated saying it.  I hated even thinking it, but it was the truth.  I knew what I'd felt like when I finally realized that I had no one to talk to after I'd found Lauren and Tyler together and if she could avoid having to feel anything close to that, I wasn't going to be the asshole that stood in her way.
"But we were…"
"He's your best friend, Bella."  I kissed the top of her head.  "You need to work it out."
She hummed and turned her head, pressing a soft kiss against the bottom of my chin.
"You can't do that," I laughed nervously, backing away slightly.
She grinned and stepped up on her toes, her lips softly against mine.  I pulled her tight against me, dragging my hands up and down her back before she stepped away from me.
"You still have all my bags from the other day in your car, don't you?"
I nodded, brushing the end of my nose against hers before kissing her again.
"You want them?"
"Yeah.  I'm thinking that the glasses I got my mom for Christmas might not survive another night in the cold."
I laughed softly and kissed her once more before unwinding my arms from her shoulders and stepping back.  I grabbed her hand and led her back towards the car, pulling open the back door.  I let go of her hand and grabbed all the bags, nodding towards the front door of her apartment when she protested.
"I'm perfectly capable of bringing those in."
"Yes, I'm sure you are," I said easily, nudging her with my elbow and nodding towards her front door again.  "But I want to do this for you.  Accept it and get moving."
She huffed and pouted before turning on her heel and walking towards the front door.  I smirked at the back of her head and followed her, setting the bags just inside as she opened it.
"I'll pick you up tomorrow morning," I said softly, looking around for Jacob as I stood on the front step.
What'd he do; disappear?  Not that I'd be complaining about that…
"I need to actually bring my car back here tomorrow night so… yeah," she laughed quietly, running a hand through her hair.
"Call me if you need anything, all right?"  I stepped up to her, threading my hands through her hair and resting my thumbs on her neck.  "I don't care what time it is."
She nodded, her hands coming up to rest on my arms as she sighed.
"Gonna miss you," she mumbled quietly.
My heart thumped loudly in my chest and I grinned, leaning down and gently touching my lips to hers.
"I'm gonna miss you too," I whispered as I pulled away from her.
She smiled and huffed, nodding once before squeezing my wrists.  I dropped my hands from her hair and kissed her once more.
"See you tomorrow morning."
She nodded and bit her bottom lip, grabbing the edge of the door and leaning against it.  I smirked at her and turned, shoving my hands in my pockets and sighing heavily as I started down the path towards my car.  I climbed in, watching as she waved at me and closed the door before I started the car and backed out of the parking space.
I made it back to my apartment twenty minutes later, climbed out of my car and started up the walkway, jiggling my keys in the palm of my hand and dragging my feet to the front door.  I half-heartedly pushed through the door to my apartment and stepped inside, slamming the door shut behind me as I reached over and flipped on the lights.
I slowly looked around my empty, silent apartment and pursed my lips, twisting them to the side before toeing off my shoes and peeling my coat from my shoulders.  I hung it up and stuffed my keys in the pocket, slowly walking into the kitchen and staring at the counters.
Fuck.
I missed her already.  I'd just left her and I missed her already.  I was either already whipped beyond comparison or that much of a complete loser.
Everything just felt… empty.  I don't know when the hell she'd become the one to fill all the holes in my life because I sure as hell never really wanted to depend on anyone like that ever again, but it was the truth.  My apartment was completely devoid of anything and everything I'd originally thought it stood for without her.
It fucking terrified me beyond what words could possibly say and I didn't know what the fuck I was supposed to do about it.

Back or Next

Eighteen

*Bella*
My eyes fluttered open the next morning and landed on the skin of Edward's neck, his even breaths hot against the top of my head.  His arms were still wrapped around me, our legs were still tangled together and I was completely content.  I smiled softly, leaning back a little and watching as he continued to sleep.
He looked completely relaxed, the lines on his forehead gone from the day before and his lips slightly pursed.  I slowly slid my arm from around his waist, placing my hand over his heart and closing my eyes as I concentrated on his heartbeat, steady and strong underneath my palm.
He was real.  He was the one that I was with and he was the one that I should've been thinking about all day yesterday; not Mike.  I loved Mike, I always would and there was a very big part of me that had never wanted to wake up from that dream, but he wasn't here anymore.  He wasn't around and I couldn't do anything to change that.  But Edward was.  Edward was here, he was real and he, for some unfathomable reason, wanted me.
It was hard as fuck to think about letting go of Mike.  I'd held on to him for so long, he'd been the one person I could always talk to – even after his death, through the journal I used to write to him in – when I needed it and he'd been the one constant thing in my life.  But he wasn't there and it was exhausting holding on to a ghost.
I knew that there was a part of me that would never be able to give him up, much in the same fashion that I'd never been able to give Josh up no matter what Tanya thought.  Mike had helped me with that and now, maybe Edward could help me with this.  Maybe he could be the one to save me.
I swallowed hard and blew out a slow breath, shaking my head.
It was hard thinking about things that way.  My heart was breaking and mending all at the same time and the rest of me was having issues coping with everything that was going on.  I never thought that there'd be anyone else; I thought that Mike was it.  And Edward… Edward had the ability to be everything I'd never been looking for and that was terrifying.
I didn't want to think about all that had happened yesterday with Rosalie.  It was too much to deal with and think about when I felt like I was on the edge of breaking down.  I was going to make it right and I was going to fix myself as much as possible – no matter how scared I was.  Everyone in my life deserved it and damn it, I did, too.  I deserved happiness at some point and if I could find that with Edward, then I would do everything I could to protect it.
I hated being the way that I was.  I hated being scared of everything that may or may not have been around every corner.  I hated that there was still a part of me that was scared of Edward and all the things that he was making me feel.  I hated that I still wanted to hide in a corner and rebuild the wall that he'd just started to take down because he didn't deserve it.  He deserved someone who was ready and willing to give herself to him completely and I wanted to be that person.  I wanted that more than anything in the world.
I splayed my fingers out on his chest, creating bumps in his shirt as I ran my hand over and up to his opposite shoulder.  I cupped my hand around his neck briefly before I reached up and carefully threaded my fingers through his hair.  I slid my thumb across his forehead a few times, smirking when his eyebrows twitched and he snorted a little.  I untangled my hand from his hair, placed it on his cheek, leaned in and gently touched my lips to his.
If I was going to give my heart away to someone else, I'd want it to be him.  That, all on its own, was mind-numbingly terrifying.  No matter the truth that went with it, it still scared the shit out of me.
I dropped my hand, slowly turning my back to him and gently prying his arms from around my waist.  I slid to the edge of the mattress and turned around to drape the blanket over him, standing up, leaning over and softly kissing his forehead.
"Don't leave me, Bella," he whispered.
I pulled back a little, watching as his eyes fluttered open and he looked up at me.
"What?"
"Don't go."
"I was just going to make us some coffee…"
"I need you more than I need coffee."
"Are you okay?" I asked as I slid one of my knees onto the mattress and placed my palms down in front of him.
He nodded and his hand slid out from underneath the blanket, slowly searching for mine.  I grabbed it, linked our fingers and let him weakly pull me back to his side.
"I just… yesterday morning, we didn't get…"  He huffed and closed his eyes, shaking his head as he squeezed my hand.  "I wanna wake up with you.  That's all."
I nodded and lay back down, getting close to him once more and curling up against him as he draped the blanket back over me.  He kept my hand in his, his other arm curling underneath me and wrapping around my waist.  He trailed his hand up and down on my back and I reached up to thread my hand through his hair, cupping the back of his head as he sighed quietly.
"I like it when you're here," he whispered, his eyes still closed.
I smiled and leaned my forehead against his, gently scraping my nails against his scalp.
"Even when we're having a bad day?"
"Especially when we're having a bad day."
"Why's that?"
"Because you're here to work it out with me," he whispered again, his eyes slowly opening to mine.  "We knew it wasn't going to be easy and it isn't, but you keep staying."
"As long as you want me here."
"You're gonna be here for a while, then."  My heart fluttered and I squeezed his hand.  "Is that okay with you?"
"Yes," I whispered, nodding and closing my eyes.
"I'm sorry about yesterday morning."
"It's not your fault."
"It's not yours, either."  I opened my eyes again and bit my bottom lip.  "I shouldn't have reacted that way."
"You had every right to react that way.  I hurt you and you had every right to act the way you did."
"I hurt you, too.  I should've listened when you tried to explain it to me."
I sucked in a deep breath and leaned forward to brush the end of my nose against his, feeling better when he smiled lazily.
"Live and learn."
"I think we're gonna be doing a lot of that."
"I think so, too."
I leaned up and pressed my lips to his forehead, wrapping both of my arms around his neck as he let go of my hand to pull me against him tightly.  He buried his face in my throat and I tilted my head to rest my cheek on the top of his.
"You wanna talk about Rosalie?" he asked softly.
"Not right now."
"Do you think she'll be at dinner tonight?"
"Emmett said that he wouldn't let that happen.  He needs a few days to calm down so that he can talk to her rationally and he wants me to get a break, too."
"I'm going in to see about a bike tomorrow after work."  He shifted away from me slightly, tilting his head back to look at me.  "You wanna come?"
"Talked you into it, didn't he?"
He laughed and nodded, shrugging.
"I was going to get one anyway.  I'm just doing it sooner than anticipated."
"You can say no to him, you know."  I laughed and placed my hands on his cheeks.  "He may be big but he won't kill you for telling him no."
"I know.  We had a good time hanging out yesterday.  I enjoyed myself."
"Good.  I'm glad to hear that."
"Can I ask you a question?"
"Are you really gonna ask it or do I have to try reading your mind?"
He narrowed an eye at me and I grinned brightly at him, reaching up and pushing a few stray hairs off his forehead.
"Are either you or Carlisle related to Angela and Ben?"
"No, why?"
"They're coming to dinner tonight, right?"
I nodded.  "Yeah, why?"
"I thought this was a family thing?"
"Angela and Ben are family," I smiled, leaning in and resting my forehead against his.  "Ben works with Emmett and met Angela when Emmett had to come and see me at work for something.  Emmett met Rosalie the same day.  We're all connected and we all consider each other family."
"It's nice, isn't it?" he whispered, his eyes searching mine.
"What?"
"To have all of your closest… people right there all the time?  Knowing that they're always going to stand behind you; support you?  Love you?"
"You're a part of that now," I whispered back, once again threading my fingers in through his hair and closing my eyes.  "The minute you stepped over that threshold on your first day, you were officially a part of our family."
"Yeah?"
I opened my eyes and nodded, smiling when I saw the smirk on his face.
"Yes."
He hummed, pursing his lips and leaning forward to kiss me quickly and gently.  He hummed again, nodding before grinning wickedly and pulling me closer to him.
"So then… this would be incest."
"Edward!" I laughed, wiggling in his arms.
"Well!  It would be by your standards!"
"Then I guess we shouldn’t be together anymore."
I raised an eyebrow at him and he scrunched his face together, quickly shaking his head and burying his face in my throat again.
"No," he grumbled, whining.  "I don't like that idea at all."
"Then get that thought out of your head."
"Gone.  Promise."
He nuzzled his nose into my throat and I smiled, hitching a leg over his hip and sighing quietly.
"You have family here, Edward," I whispered into his hair, closing my eyes once more.  "Don't forget that, okay?"
"Okay," he mumbled, pressing his lips against my throat and lingering there.
"What did you wanna do before dinner?"
"I have to get some work done," he sighed heavily.
"You can drive me home, if you want, so that I don't distract you."
His arms tightened around me and he shook his head, placing an open-mouthed kiss over my collarbone.  I barely suppressed a shudder and bit my bottom lip, my eyes rolling in the back of my head.
Fuck if he wasn't good at that.
"You won't distract me," he mumbled, his tongue tracing my collarbone.
"I don't think I'm doing a very good job of not distracting you."
"Doesn't count.  I'm not working yet."
I took a deep breath and gently tugged on his hair, barely suppressing the laugh that made its way up my throat when he whined and grunted at me.
"You should get to it," I told him, smirking.  "I'll make breakfast?"
"In a hurry or something?"
"No."
"Why are you pushing me out?" he pouted.
"Because you've got things to get done today before we go to dinner."
"That's a whole…"  He shook his head and sighed, throwing one hand up in the air.  "A lot of hours away.  Just stay here with me for a little while longer."
He batted his eyes at me and pushed his bottom lip out, sniffling dramatically.  I laughed and plunged my face into his neck, tightening my hold around him and breathing out a contented sigh.  He hummed in appreciation and his arms were once again around my waist, his hands making smooth motions over my back.  We stayed there for at least another hour, lazily running our hands over each other and barely speaking, choosing to revel in the silence and the comfort until he groaned and shifted.
"Hm?" I managed, yawning.
"I have really gotta use the bathroom."
I snorted and laughed, shaking my head and looking up to press a kiss against his chin before rolling away.
"Are you still up for making me coffee?"
I looked over at him and shrugged, smirking.
"I guess so."
He hummed and sat up on his elbow, leaning over and placing a kiss firmly against my lips before rolling away and climbing off the bed.  I watched as he stretched, his arms over his head and his back slightly arched before he dug his hands into his hair and scratched.  I smiled as he padded out of the bedroom and listened as the bathroom door closed.  I yawned and stretched, flattening my hands on the headboard before I rolled out of bed and ran a hand through my hair as I walked out of the bedroom and into the kitchen.
I would deal with the shit in my head when I was sitting in the therapist's office with a mound of tissues in my lap and my heart on my sleeve.  Until then, I was going to live in the moment with Edward the way he'd asked me to and I was going to do my best to enjoy every second of it.
It was impossible to know when it would all be ripped away from me.  It undoubtedly would be, because that's the way my life worked but until then, I was going to try really hard to be myself and be the girl that Edward really deserved to have in his life.  I didn't want to be a failure anymore; I didn't want to fail him anymore.  I would do whatever I could to keep him for as long as possible.
~*~
"You need to relax," I laughed as Edward pulled into the driveway of my mom's house.  "You already know everyone here."
"I don't know your mother," he said quickly, his eyes wide as he stared at the house and shoved the car into park.
"She won't kill you."
"She might!"
"Edward," I sighed dramatically, leaning my elbow on the console between the seats and looking over at him.  "You need to calm down."
"Have you even told her that you're dating me yet?  Is she going to cut my head off or beat me with something because she doesn't know?"
"I'm pretty sure she knows.  I haven't told her."  I bit my bottom lip when his eyes got even wider in an attempt not to laugh at him.  "But I know that Carlisle has."
"Why didn't you tell her?  Isn't that something you should've told her?  Bella, she's gonna kill me!"
I tilted my head and reached up to run my hand through his hair, watching as his chest heaved up and down with each breath he took and his eyes darted from one part of the house to the other.
We'd spent most of the morning in the living room; me watching bad television and him working on charts as he absently rubbed circles into the arches of my feet.  He'd driven me almost to the point where I was going to attack him if he didn't stop and I was pretty sure that he didn't even realize it.
"Why do you think she's going to kill you?"
"I don't know!" he huffed, shaking his head.
I rested my head against the headrest and my hand on the back of his neck, pursing my lips and watching as he continued to breathe heavily and look around frantically.  You think I'd just threatened him with a guillotine or something to that effect.  He'd been fine all morning and the rest of the afternoon.  He'd never mentioned anything about being nervous about this dinner and I didn't quite understand where the nerves had come from now.
"Edward," I said softly, rubbing my thumb in circles underneath his ear.
"What?"
"Look at me."
He slowly turned to look at me, his eyes still wide and terrified and I felt a twinge of sympathy run through me.  If the roles were reversed, I'd be just as nervous and scared as Edward was.
"My mom is not a scary person.  No, I didn't tell her and I'll be the one to get hell for that, but it will have nothing to do with you.  Okay?"  He nodded slowly and I watched his throat move as he swallowed.  "Calm down."
"I've never had to… I always knew…"
It finally clicked.  He'd never had to meet parents before because he'd always known Lauren's parents.  He'd grown up with her; her parents were probably better than his own and he'd never had to worry about it.
I unbuckled my seat belt and leaned over, kissing him softly.
"It's okay," I whispered, backing away from him.
He huffed out a breath and nodded, kissing me again before unbuckling his seat belt.  I sat back in my seat and opened the door, climbing out and closing it behind me.  I waited for him at the hood of the car, holding my hand out to him when he finally made it out.  He grabbed it quickly, intertwining our fingers and squeezing tightly.
"Should we have brought something?  Should I have brought something? Wine?  Anything?"
I laughed and started to pull him in the direction of the porch, shaking my head.
"Mom doesn't drink and we don't need to bring anything, no.  Stop worrying."
"Easy for you to say," he grumbled as we walked up the few steps to the front door.
I rolled my eyes and smirked, squeezing his hand again and pushing through the door.  I immediately smelled pot roast and moaned, tilting my head back and shedding my coat.  Edward did the same and I hung both of them on the peg behind the door, toeing off my shoes and walking to the middle of the room.  Edward was immediately at my side, sans shoes, with his hand on the small of my back.
"Mom!" I called out, walking through the kitchen.  "Hello?"
"Isabella Marie!"
"Oh that can't be good," Edward mumbled.
I snorted and followed her voice into the extra bedroom she'd converted into the computer room, finding her sitting at the computer with her eyes glued to the screen.
"I think there's something you haven't told me."
She pursed her lips and raised an eyebrow, tearing her eyes from the screen and pushing the keyboard in as she turned to us.
"Mom, this is Edward Masen."  I grabbed his arm and pulled him into full view, grinning brightly at her.  "My boyfriend."
She stood up, grinning at him and pushing me out of the way to wrap her arms around his neck, hugging him tightly.  I snorted at the panicked look on his face, crossing my arms over my chest and pressing my lips together.  He laughed nervously and loosely wrapped his arms around her waist.
"It's nice to meet you," she said politely before stepping back from him and rounding on me.  "Not that my daughter told me beforehand!"
"I've been busy!"
"Excuses, excuses."
Her lips twitched and she laughed, throwing her arms around me and hugging me tightly.  I laughed and did the same, hugging her back and burying my face into her shoulder.
"He's hot, honey," she whispered into my ear.
I threw my head back and laughed loudly, noisily kissing her cheek before I stepped back and nodded.
"Yeah."
"Everyone else said they'd be here around six or so," she stated, looking between us and clasping her hands together.  "I understand Rose isn't coming."
I hummed and shook my head, crossing my arms over my chest and looking down at my feet.
"We had a bit of a falling out yesterday and Emmett told her not to come."
"I heard," she nodded, her jaw tense as she crossed her arms over her stomach.  "You should've told your brother sooner."
"He was happy with her, mom.  I wasn't going to ruin that."
She sighed heavily and looked over at Edward, jutting a thumb at me.
"She's infuriating sometimes, isn't she?"
"Uh," he stuttered, laughing nervously and stuffing his hands in his pockets.  "I, uhm…"
I laughed and walked over to him, shaking my head and gently pulling on his shirt.
"Relax," I whispered.
"I don't bite!" my mother declared happily.
I snorted and leaned forward, resting my forehead on Edward's chest and shaking my head.
"Is there anything we can do to help you, mom?" I asked innocently, looking over at her.
"No, not really."  She shook her head and plopped back down into the computer chair.  "I've got everything under control."
"Are you sure?"
She nodded enthusiastically, waving us off as she pulled the keyboard back out.
"Go relax.  Watch TV or something.  No humping in my house!" she declared, one of her arms above her head as she turned back to the screen.
"Oh, Christ," I moaned, laughing as I pushed Edward backward.
His face was pale and his mouth was hanging open, his eyes as wide as ever as he let me push him back out into the hallway.
"We're a very open family," I explained, laughing and licking my lips as he stared over my head.
"I guess," he managed, his voice hoarse.
I leaned forward and rested my chin on his chest, looking up at him and watching as he kept his eyes trained on the doorway behind me.
"You gonna look at me at all for the rest of the day?"
He looked down at me and grabbed one of my hands, placing it over his rapidly beating heart and offering me a small, nervous smile.
"Edward," I whispered, standing up straight.
"I've never… Bella, this is all new to me and I just… I don't wanna screw it up."
"You won't.  It's physically impossible to screw this up."
"Give me ten minutes," he breathed.  "I'm sure I'll figure out a way."
I twisted my lips to the side before moving my hand from his chest and walking back into the computer room.
"What're you looking for?" my mother asked absently.
"My… thing," I mumbled, yanking open the closet door and sinking to my knees.
"That narrows it down."
"Hush."
I pushed things out of the way, shaking my head at the bin full of wrapping paper for various events before finally finding the black case that I was looking for.  I dragged it out, grunting as I stood up and closed the closet doors.  I smiled brightly at my mother before wiggling my fingers at her and walking back out of the room.  I grabbed Edward's hand, pulling him back down the hallway and into the living room, plopping down on the couch and looking up at him.  He sat down next to me, his hand still in mine as he pulled it into his lap and stroked his thumb over the back of it.  I hefted the bag onto my lap, looking over at him and licking my lips.
"This is my portfolio," I said quietly.
He looked down at the shoulder bag in my lap before looking back at me, nodding slowly.
"Yeah?"
I nodded and shook my hand out of his, flipping open the clasps on the bag and pulling out the expensive black portfolio that I hadn't changed since I'd left college.  I pushed the bag off my lap and turned to face him completely, handing it to him.  He took it, placing it on his lap and opening it.  I grabbed the ribbon on the side, showing him how to pull out the matted prints before letting it go and sliding back on the couch.  I clasped my hands between my knees and pressed my lips together, watching from the corner of my eye as he turned prints over.
He'd read the letter that I wrote to Mike and that had been as personal as I could ever get.  But this was something different; this was what I worked my ass off on and something that was almost as personal as that letter.  I could only hope that he'd accept it and understand how absolutely personal it was.  I didn't think much of the photographs in that portfolio; in fact, I hated most of them.  But there were the two or three that I was incredibly proud of that had somehow managed to strip me bare and he'd see that.  If I knew him like I think I did, he'd see everything that I'd ever tried hiding from anyone outside of my family and I prayed to God that he'd accept it.
I looked over at him as he snapped the portfolio closed, his head tilted at me as he rested his arms on the top of it and smirked at me.
"You are very talented, Bella," he said softly.  "Every single one of these is great."
"No, they're really not.  You don't have to say…"
He leaned over, his lips against mine, effectively shutting me up.  He scooted closer to me, one of his hands coming up to rest on my cheek as he worked his bottom lip in between mine and sucked my top lip into his mouth.  I moaned quietly and placed my hand on his wrist, squeezing it as I traced my tongue over his lip.
"Hey now!  That's not something I needed to see!"
I sighed heavily as Edward immediately sat back from me, his hands flat on the cover of my portfolio as he stared wide-eyed at my grinning brother in the doorway.  Any other time, he could be heard from miles away and I'd have a slight warning.  This time, when I really didn't want to be interrupted, he's as quiet as a fucking mouse.
"You need bells or something," I grumbled.
"Bells?  For what?"
"So that I can hear you when you're interrupting me."
He laughed loudly and walked over to us, plopping down in between us and slinging an arm over my shoulders.
"What fun is that?"
I sighed heavily and leaned against him, smirking as he immediately wrapped his arm around me and squeezed tightly.
"You okay?" I asked softly, looking up at him.
He smiled slightly at me and nodded.
"I will be.  And you need to speak up sometimes, Bella.  That wasn't fair."
"You've been with her for three and a half years, Emmett."
"And I've known you for twenty-two.  You always come first."
"But you were gonna…"
"Yeah," he said quickly, shaking his head and briefly closing his eyes.  "Things change sometimes."
"Emmett…"
"She gave me a lot to think about, Bells.  And I'm doing a lot of thinking, which you should not be worrying about."  He turned to Edward, nodding at my portfolio and I pursed my lips, huffing.  "What did you think?"
"I think your sister is very talented."
"Try telling her that."
Edward snorted and I peeked around Emmett, playfully narrowing my eyes at him.  He did the same back at me, even going so far as to stick his tongue out at me and causing me to throw my head back in laughter.
"You two are disgusting," he mumbled, shaking his head and hefting himself off the couch.  "I'm going to bug mom."
He walked out without waiting for an answer from either of us and I immediately lay down, waiting for Edward to set my portfolio off to the side before I rested my head in his lap and looked up at him.  He placed one hand on the top of my head and the other on my stomach as he looked down at me.
"Have you ever thought about writing again?" he asked softly.
I shrugged one shoulder, pursing my lips.
"I'm always thinking about it."
"You have ideas?"
I nodded, closing my eyes and humming.
"Always have ideas."
"Why don't you write some down?"
I shrugged.
"I don't know.  Never had the time, I guess."
"Hm."
"What?"
I opened my eyes, looked up at him, watching as he pursed his lips, and shook his head as he grinned down at me.
"Nothing."
"Should I be scared?"
"No."
I nodded, eyeing him before closing my eyes again and wiggling a little.
"All right then."
"Are you staying with me again tonight?" he asked softly, running his hand over the top of my head.
"I should go home."
"Mm," he grumbled.  "Why?"
I opened my eyes again and smirked, reaching up and placing one hand on his cheek, rubbing my thumb over the bridge of his nose.
"You might get tired of me."
"Oh, I doubt that."
"Absence makes the heart grow fonder."
"Are you trying to get rid of me?"
I laughed and shook my head.
"Never."
"Then stay with me tonight, Bella," he whispered, his hand splaying out on my stomach and slowly inching my shirt up.  "I like having you there.  I like falling asleep with you."
My breath caught in my throat and I sat up a little, quickly pressing my lips to his.
"You always know what to say, don't you?" I whispered as I backed away from him and fell back into his lap.
"It's always the truth.  I'd never lie to you."
I sat up completely and crawled into his lap, framing his face with my hands.  He smirked, all of his nerves seemingly gone as he wrapped his arms around me.
"That means more to me than anything," I said softly.
"Well, I've learned that you don't screw over the important people in your life.  And right now, you are the most important person in my life."
"You're just full of the right words today, aren't you?"
"Right or wrong, I mean them."
I leaned in, kissing him softly and wrapping my arms around his neck.  His hands trailed up my back, flattening against my shoulder blades and pulling me closer.
"Hey, now!" Emmett yelled again.
I huffed against Edward's mouth and slowly pulled back from him, looking over to glare at my younger brother.  He merely grinned and plopped down into the armchair next to us, snatching the television remote and flicking it on.
"Bells," I grumbled.  "You're getting them for Christmas."
"There's a game on," he said absently, ignoring me.  "You interested in watching, Edward?"
"Hell yes."
I sighed heavily, defeated as I kissed him again and climbed off his lap.  He grabbed my hand and brought it to his lips, his eyes on mine as he kissed my knuckles.  Sparks that I thought I'd be used to by now shot up through my arm and, interestingly enough, straight down between my legs.  I bit my bottom lip and dragged the back of my pointer finger over his chin before he let me go.
"Who're you going for?" Emmett asked, completely oblivious to the way I wanted to jump Edward whether he was in the room or not.
"Giants," he answered immediately, dropping my hand and leaning around me to see the television.
I rolled my eyes, hiding a smirk and put my portfolio back together, stuffing it in its case before walking out and back to the computer room.  My mom was still sitting at the computer and merely slid a glance over at me as I put the bag back into the closet and plopped down on the extra bed behind me.
"So?" she asked slowly.
"He's talking sports with Emmett."
"I don't care about that," she huffed, turning in the chair and eyeing me.  "Give me details, girl!"
I laughed and slid back on the bed, curling my legs underneath me and propping my elbows on my knees.
"Like what?"
"First of all, why the hell did it take you so damn long to tell me?"
"Because it just happened the day before yesterday?"
"More than enough time to call your lonely old mother and fill her in."  She batted her eyes at me, tilting her head and pushing her bottom lip out in a pout.  "I had to hear it from Carlisle."
"Things have been crazy," I said quietly, dragging my teeth along my bottom lip.  "I'm amazed that he's even here right now."
She immediately popped up from the computer chair and walked over to me, sitting behind me.  I turned to her, resting my head against her shoulder as she wrapped her arms tightly around my shoulders and leaned her head against the top of mine.
"What happened, baby?"
"We were… together," I mumbled, fiddling with my hands.  "And I had a dream of Mike the same night."
She whistled out a low breath and I huffed.
"It wasn't like the other ones.  I actually talked to him this time."
"What'd he tell you?"
"Everything I'd wanted to hear."
"That's bad?"
"I still miss him," I whispered, guilt clutching my heart.
"Baby, you're going to," she whispered, one of her hands coming up to smooth down my hair.  "And I'm sure Edward understands that."
"Yeah."
"Mike would want you to be happy and if you're happy with Edward, then why question it?  You've gotta learn to just be, little girl."
"I'm trying," I breathed out on a laugh.  "I'm calling about going back to therapy tomorrow.  Edward said he'd go with me when the time came."
She hummed in appreciation and I smirked, closing my eyes and breathing evenly as we listened to Emmett scream at the television.  I heard Edward laugh nervously and I snorted, shaking my head.
"He needs to relax," she declared.
I laughed and wrapped my arms around her waist, all but curling into her lap and burying my face in her neck.
"He was fine all day and the minute we pulled into the driveway, you think that I'd just told him that he was being sent to the shooting range or something."
"Ah, men," she sighed, pressing a quick kiss to the top of my head before pulling away from me.  "Come help me put the extra leaf in the table.  I'm not used to all of these guests for Sunday dinner."
"My love life is apparently a monumental occasion."
She laughed and got off the bed, shaking her head and pointing at me over her shoulder as she started out of the room.
"You're just universally loved," she quipped.
I snorted again and got off the bed, walking behind her and standing in the dining room, looking in to the living room to see Edward with his elbows resting on his knees as he leaned in towards the television.  I hooked my thumbs into my jean pockets and tilted my head at him, smiling.  He looked over at me and sat up straight, grinning crookedly at me as Emmett continued to scream at the television.  I placed my fingertips over my lips and he grinned, winking at me before his attention was once again stolen by the game on television.
I smirked and shook my head before walking to the table and pulling off the tablecloth.  I raised an eyebrow when I saw my mother standing in front of me, the extra leaf leaning against her stomach as she crossed her arms over her chest and smirked at me.
"What?"
She merely shook her head and held her hands up at her sides.
"He makes you happy," she said quietly, tilting her head in the direction of the living room.  "It's easy and nice to see, Bella, that's all."
My face burned and I shrugged one shoulder as I draped the cloth over one of the chairs and walked to one end of the table.
"Yeah."
He did.  And right now, that was all that should matter.  I was about to be surrounded by the people I considered family, here to either embarrass the hell out of me in front of Edward with stories that I never wanted him to hear or question him relentlessly about things that were only important to them.  Either way, for the first time in a long time, I was content.

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